It's Been A While...

 Now that song is my head. Not sure who sings it. Staind? Anyway, I'm not doing so hot with the weight loss thing. Truth is, I'm not necessarily eating everything in sight so it's not so bad. It's just becoming more difficult to plan these days and WW takes a lot of planning. With Christmas just a few short weeks away, I'm gonna give myself to the New Year and pick back up. I will definitely get back to it. When things slow down a bit and some hugely stressful stuff is finally resolved, I think my mind will be in a place where I can focus much easier. So that's that.

Second, a good friend of mine told me about a movement called "To Write Love on Her Arms". I had already heard of it and had a pretty good idea what it might have to do with. Well, I visited the website yesterday and it turns out I was right. It's about self-injury. (Side Note: I just thew my arms in the air and yelled "I see flurries" as I'm witnessing my first snowfall of the season!) Ok. Back to TWLOHA.

 Everyone knows about drug addictions and alcohol addictions. Everyone knows that many addicts use those things to get through life. To push down pain that keeps surfacing. I would venture to say that all addicts are doing that, if they were really honest with themselves. What people don't seem to know about is self injury. Maybe you've heard of people who cut lines on their arms or legs or other body parts. Or people that burn marks on their bodies. People who consume chemicals to injure their insides. I think there is a stigma attached to it so self injurers aren't as forthcoming. Well, that's not the only reason. It's also because it's something secret that belongs only to them.

 Anyway, I think it's great that someone is putting out information to the public and doing it in a way that isn't making current and former self injurers feel like a loser or a freak. Writing love instead of hate for yourself. It's like a breath of fresh air. If people would get educated on the subject matter maybe the problem could be addressed and stopped. Before it leads to death. Although, self injury is not the same as a suicide attempt. It's not like that. But eventually, one cut isn't enough to push down the pain. It becomes 2 cuts. Then 3. Then 10. And deeper. Until it can become life threatening, even if that is not the intent.

 Don't turn away from a self injurer. Don't sum them up to being a freak and move on. Try to be sympathetic. Try to be understanding. And for pete's sake, check out the website- twolha.com

Missing Me?

Suddenly I have the John Waite song in my head- "I ain't missin' you at all....missin' you....since you've been gone....away..." I love that song. I used to listen to JW all the time and even saw him in concert a few times. I heard an acoustic version of "When I See You Smile" and it was amazing. Anyway, I have no idea where that came from.

I've been missing. MIA. No blog. Nothing. Well, I was off work three days last week in preparation for Lainie's birthday bash. Well, that and I spent her actual birthday (Veteran's Day) just playing with her after I got her pics done. Oh my gosh. It was seriously the first time I've ever taken her for professional pics. She's usually such a ham for a picture. Of course, not when I'm paying someone to take them. But, what they did get of her turned out very cute so it was still worth it.

So, does being blog-MIA mean that I've been a bad girl? Call Santa, because this gal has landed on the naughty list! Yes, with all of the running around and cleaning and working I admit to eating some lousy food. Then there was the birthday party. Yep. Indulgence Central.

However, I'm happy to report that Robb and I are buying a Wii from his cousins for a VERY reasonable price so we've both started using the Wii Fit and playing games against each other on the Wii. Can I please tell you how much I totally L-O-V-E the Wii Fit? First of all, you make a little gal (or guy if you choose) to represent you. Super fun. Then you balance and weigh and it tracks the time you spend each day working out and as you add minutes to your work-out time piggy bank you unlock new and exciting activities. I love the yoga on there! Absolutely love it. It's so much fun. Robb and I have agreed to play games against each other each night and stop wasting so much time watching useless, mindless tv. I mean, we have tv shows that we're not gonna give up, but there aren't that many of them. Sons of Anarchy only has 2 eps left which means there will be nothing to watch on Tuesdays. Mondays we only watch Two and 1/2 Men (and Robb watches silly Wrestling...love you honey). Wednesdays are trickiest because Robb works the entire day and we usually like to relax while watching Modern Family (oh my gosh, so funny) and Cougar Town (started off strong, but starting to fade for me) and then we watch whatever MTV thing is on- right now it's a challenge but pretty soon it will be a new Real World. Thursdays I record Vampire Diaries but I'm starting to lose interest. So it's not like we have shows to watch every single second of the evening. I look for a lot of Wii time to be happening soon!

It seems I still owe you recipes. I promise I'll try but 3 days off work means about 3 weeks worth of work to return to. I'm trying to keep my head above water right now. But I will try. Happy Weighs Day (yeah, I totally forgot to weigh this morning but I will weigh tonight on the Wii....truth is, I thought today was Thursday and I was really excited until I realized I was wrong!

Monday Blues

  Really, I shouldn't be blue on this relatively nice Monday morning. I'm just exhausted from a really great, but action-packed weekend. First of all, we surprised Robb for his birthday on Saturday. That was a go-go-go kind of day. Then yesterday we played at the park- Lainie's first park experience. Super fun. We went to bed kind of late last night (because Robb had to watch the Cowboys game, but oh well, it was his birthday).

 We had the super duper lasagna for which I had hinted I would post over the weekend. I fully intended too but then did not have the time. I'll post it this week with the points. Obviously, I'm behind on my recipe provisions as I still havent' gotten to the green bean casserole, sweet potato pie, or the pumpkin pie recipe. But I will

 Next weekend is Lainie's birthday party (Wednesday is her 1st birthday *sniff, sniff*) She's getting to big too fast. But I've been told this happens. Anyway, it's going to be this glorious princess bash. Really, it's my dream birthday party lived out through her, because she doesn't have the choice.

 Well, I used flex points this weekend so I could enjoy birthday cake, but overall did pretty good! Happy Monday!

This Gal is Working for the Weekend

  Happy Friday!!! Isn't it always nice to wake up and realize it's Friday? I mean, even if you have to go to work you're still super excited because you know that the very second you're off work, it's THE WEEKEND!! And the weekend is what it's all about. 

 So, my weekend is going to be pretty eventful. First of all, we pick up Emily after work and I'm thinking chicken tacos for dinner. See recipe below. Then tomorrow the ladies are shopping while the hubby's a'workin'. Of course, we're actually shopping for the hubby since his birthday is Sunday. I'd like to send a shout out to my stud muffin hubby (because he really does read my blogs- he even quotes them sometimes- that's a hubby that should get a round of applause- *sound of applause*). HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ROBEAR! I'm making lasagna for his birthday dinner Sunday. I know what you're thinkng- oooooooooooooh, you're gonna go over points! *tisk, tisk* Well, my finger-shaking friends, I actually have figured out a way to make it a bit easier on the points. Granted, with all of that cheesy goodness it's not going to be perfectly point-friendly. However, I bought reduced fat Sargento's shredded mozz cheese (they make a mean RF cheese) and light Riccotta cheese. So, right there I cut loads of fat. The rest of the meal isn't too awful- whole grain lasagna noodles, 90% lean ground beef, tomato sauce and paste, and spaghetti sauce packets (to make your own sauce) and none of those things are point killers. Super yummy! I'll just have to work my points right but I can still enjoy this tasty feast! Perhaps, if you're lucky, I'll share the secret family recipe for my mom's lasagna. There is literally nothing like it. Just ask anyone that's had it.

 Kendy's Super Yum Chicken Tacos (ok, they're just plain old chicken tacos, but hey, gotta throw my name on the recipe)

4-6 chicken breasts, skinless, boneless (we usually cook 4 large breasts)
2-3 tbsp taco seasoning (or one envelope)
8 flour tortillas (I just can't do the corn variety- super yuck)
Non-stick cooking spray

Lightly coat a skillet with spray. Cut chicken into bite sized pieces and add to the pan. Add seasoning. Cook until chicken is cooked through. Heat tortillas. Add chicken to tortillas.

Makes about 8 servings. Add whatever toppings you like. We love love love chicken tacos at my house.

NOTICE TO MOMS: This is a super, simple and quick recipe for dinner. I always keep the ingredients on hand for those nights I just don't feel like putting a lot of effort into dinner. I buy bags of frozen chicken breasts and just set out however many I need before I leave for work and voila!- dinner made easy.

NOTICE TO THE WEIGHT CONCIOUS: These tacos are sooooo incredibly easy on the points. Add fat free shredded cheddar (very low point) and salsa (which is free, my friend, free as a bird) and you have a very filling, healthy meal. I usually eat around 3 tacos for about 10 points. But that usually includes FF sour cream too!

Enjoy! Have a Happy Weekend! Happy Eating!

P.S. Our computer at home is finally off the fritz which means, that's right, I can blog from home (or even bed) again! You may have an extra blog this weekend and it just might contain the recipe for my world famous (oh, but it is- at least famous in my world) lasagna!

It's Tomato Soup Day!!!

 So Walgreens has Tomato soup on sale for $.50 per can so I bought some and today, I'm having tomato soup for lunch. While it's an absolutely gorgeous day outside, it's chilly, and that's perfect for savoring some warm-the-tummy soup.

 Yesterday I was pretty bummed that I didn't have a better weight loss but then I decided that I know I'm doing well. I mean, I'm not wearing any maternity clothes anymore for crying out loud! (he he) The brand new jeans I just bought are fitting me loosely already, even when run through a piping-hot dryer. And I'm just feeling better all the time. I have more confidence. Even if it didn't show on the scales this week, those are my personal victories and the stuff I cling to when I'm feeling down about a small weight loss. Of course, there's also the point that the scales just keep going south and that's something to celebrate too. Maybe next week I'll have a super-pumpin', rock-my-face-off weight loss. But if I don't, I'm still eating super healthy and watching those points.

 Speaking of points, another victory I probably need to remind myself of is the fact that with my itty-bitty loss this week I actually dropped down into a lower "decade". That means that I lose a point which also means I'm doing the right stuff. I'm losing 5 more points here in about another week or so when I finally say goodbye to nursing and hello to a milk-drinking, one-year old.

 Still working on the recipe renovations, but fear not because they will be landing on a blog near you very soon! (heh heh) So, Happy Thursday! (and it really IS happy because that just means tomorrow is FRIDAY!!!)

It's Weighs Day (Week 6)

 Hello! Hello! Hello! It's Weighs Day! It's also middle-of-the-week day which is always nice. So, I didn't have the big loss I was looking for this week which is a bit discouraging, but I must charge on.

Week 6 Loss: .3       Total Loss: 5.5

 I defintely feel like my clothes are fitting better which is great, so it's surprising to me to come up short on the loss this week. I just have to tell myself that this is just what happens and to stay encouraged and move forward. That I am.

 I don't know if you saw or not, but the polls closed and it looks like I'm gonna be doing a recipe renovation. Actually, I'm working on the renovation for the green bean casserole right now. I'm going to go ahead and renovate Sweet Potato Pie and Pumpkin Pie as well, posting them as recipes of the week until Thanksgiving.

 Well, hope all is well with everyone and that your Weighs Day was great for you! Happy Eating!

Shake Your Groove Thang

  Honestly, I had no idea what title to give to today's blog. So there you have it. I have to share with you all that I am wearing the most adorable socks ever. They are pink with Miss Piggy on them and they say "Diva". They're so ME! Anyhoo, guess what tomorrow is? Yup! WEIGHS DAY!! Looking forward to it!

 If you have been following the blog from the beginning you know that I promised total honesty and that on the day I made said promise I also confessed to wearing maternity pants. I can now confess to you that I haven't worn any maternity pants in quite a while. Weeks, in fact. Aren't you so proud of me? heh heh Actually, my new "rockin-my-face-off" jeans are already getting loose. I even put them through the dryer (which I seldom do with new jeans) and they still are loose. Somebody's getting excited!

 I also have to say, "God bless Daylight Savings Time." I am a new woman these days. I love that it's light at 6 in the morning. It makes me feel like I got really good sleep. Going home in the dark isn't bad either. For some reason, it reminds me of Christmas and OH, how I LOVE Christmas (and Jesus). Oh yes, love love love. It's time to break out the John Denver and Muppets Christmas CD. When Miss Piggy sings, "five....goooooolden....rings.....ba da bum bum" I just get the chills. hehehe I love me some Miss Piggy. She's the original Diva if you ask me.

 Well, I have not tried any new recipes of late although there are loads and loads that I want to sample. Tonight I'm hanging with a friend so I doubt we cook anything new and adventurous. Tomorrow night, now there's another story. The hubby works until 7 which means I will have some time tomorrow night to actually cook up something fantastical. I'm going to go on the hunt for some amazing new recipe. It's gonna have to be a chicken based dish because, well, that's just about all we have at home these days.

 I love chicken. I could eat chicken every night for dinner for the rest of my life and not miss steak one single second. Or hamburger. Or pork. (Don't you worry your pretty head, Miss Piggy.) Robb on the other hand, he could eat steak at practically every meal for the rest of his life and the first thing he'd ask God for when he got to heaven would be, "Lord, got any steak? I'm gonna need A1 too." *grin* Love you, honey.

 So, tomorrow is the big day. I'm thinking I'll have a decent loss. Hope so anyway. I just have to be careful. It seems like I always pick these high-salty meals the day before Weighs Day and I think I retain water. So, no salt for me tonight. I'll be reporting in first thing in the morning. Woo hoo! Bring on the scales! Mama's not skeerd of ya!

 P.S. If anyone has a good chicken recipe for me to try, send it my way. Thanks so much! Happy Tuesday!

Happy November!!

 Wow! I can't believe we're already in to November. Where did October go?? Well, this is my favorite time of the year and therefore it always seems to fly by so quickly. Too quickly. With Halloween behind us it's now time for me to stock my car with all of my favorite Christmas CDs. Yeah. I start early. To be honest, if not for Lainie's birthday party being November 15th, I'd probably be putting our Christmas tree up now. I once put it up on November 1st. I love Christmas.

 Anyhoo, regarding WW, I splurged a bit over the weekend but have no worries! I used flex points. That's what they're there for. I still made really good choices food-wise so I'm sitting pretty. Also, do you remember a few weeks ago when I was super tired on a Monday morning and drove through McD's for a coffee and ended up with a hashbrown and cinnamelts too? Well, this morning I was desperate for some coffee and decided to drive through for a large hazelnut iced coffee. Only THIS time I got on dwlz.com from my phone (that website I told you all about where you can look up points for restaurants). I looked to see how many points stuff was. One hashbrown is 3 points (not worth it), one order of cinnamelts is 10.5 points (REALLY not worth it). One large iced hazelnut coffee is 6 points while a medium is 4.5. So, I skipped the hashbrown and cinnamelts and ordered a medium coffee. I think that's a personal victory!

 I want to give a quick shout out to the Progresso light Italian-Style Veggie soup. One serving (1/2 the can) is 0 points. I usually eat the whole can (it's so incredibly yummy) and it actually comes close enough to 2 points that I usually call it 2. But seriously- a whole can of soup for 2 flippin' points? That rocks my face off! Plus, I just stocked up on VitaTops so I'm having one for breakfast with my coffee. Mmmmm......

 Well, Happy Monday!

Happy Halloween!

 Tomorrow is Halloween and I have to honestly say that I'm thankful that while I'm being so good on WW Lainie is too young to collect candy for trick-or-treating. I won't be faced with chocolate, chocolate, and more chocolate.

 I've decided that tonight I'm finally going to try the spaghetti squash recipe that I've been meaning to make. Robb isn't coming home until late so it's just me, Lainie Lou, and the squash. The recipe if you dare:

Spaghetti Squash and Mozzarella Cheese with Veggies

1 spaghetti squash, cooked and separated into strands (free)
1 lg. yellow onion, diced (free)
1 green bell pepper, chopped (free)
1 red bell pepper, chopped (free)
Pam- olive oil (free)
3-5 cloves garlic, minced (free)
1 tsp. basil (free)
1/2 tsp. oregano (free)
1/2 tsp. crushed red pepper (optional) (free)
1 can crushed tomatoes
1 C grated mozzarella cheese (6 pts)
1/2 C grated Parmesan cheese (12 pts)

Preheat oven to 375 F. Mix the cheese together, set aside.

Heat olive oil in a skillet and add the onion, pepper and garlic. Sautee over medium heat for about 5 minutes. Add crushed tomatoes, basil, and crushed red pepper (if using). Simmer uncovered for about 15 minutes. Mix squash well with the cooked vegetables and put half in the bottom of a large (13 x 9 inch) baking dish. Top with half the cheese mixture, followed by the other half of the squash mixture, then the rest of the cheese. Bake for 30 minutes or until cheese is bubbly and slightly browned. Let cool 10-15 minutes before serving.

Total Points: 18    Servings: 6      Points per serving: 3

 I think it's gonna be super yummy!! I'm seeing the mom and grandma tomorrow for lunch and then onto Tiff's house for some trick-or-treating! Lainie is gonna be a Hawkeye cheerleader. So adorable.

HAVE A HAPPY HALLOWEEN, ALL, AND SEE YOU BACK HERE MONDAY MORNING!!!

Recipes Recipes Galore

 Well, I don't have anything significant to report. Yesterday was Weighs Day and I met my first 5-pound goal. At the prompting of my Bestie I'm going to go out and buy a bookmark and star stickers so I can reward myself for my losses. I also indulged in some pizza last night. Mmmm.... That always seems to be my go-to reward meal.

 So, about the recipes. I'm not actually posting any today. Instead I'm going to recommend you to a few websites if you're interested in finding some super-yummy dishes that are actually healthy.

 First and foremost, my absolute favorite is Hungry Girl. Go to her website and sign up for her daily emails. They're FREE! She sends updates on the latest "diet" products as well as loads and loads of recipes. In fact, you can search her website for already-emailed recipes. She has tons of great ideas and is always renovating popular recipes. From shakes, to burgers, to desserts, anything you can imagine, she has probably renovated. She's also a WW follower apparently because she always calculates points for you. Check her out.

 Second, is the Weight Watchers website. You can view their daily recipes which sometimes includes renovations too. But the absolute best thing about the WW website is, if you are following the WW plan, if you join the e-Tools you can actually do your own recipe renovations. They have an application where you can enter all of the ingredients to your own recipes and based on the number of servings you indicate, it will generate the points for you. This way, you can go back and change out items (like swapping full-fat for reduced, low, or no fat versions) and see what points would come out to that way. It's awesome. I heart WW.

 Another great WW-based website is dwlz.com which is another website of a WW follower. She is my go-to resource for restaurant outings. You can nearly find any food for any restaurant on her website with the points value. There are also recipes posted, although I honestly visit it more for the restaurant point guides.

 So, that's my offering for the day. I'm a bit of a zombie. I'm pretty sure I slept good last night. I am coming up short on why I'm so tired. Oh well, being short means I usually do come up short. I know, hardy har har. Happy Thursday! See you back here tomorrow!

P.S. In less than two weeks my baby girl is turning one. Where did the year go? She's gonna be married with a one-year old of her own before I know it. Boo hoo.

It's WEIGHS Day! (Week 5?)

 I've lost track of what week it is now. That doesn't matter. What DOES matter is what happened at my morning weigh-in this morning! Now remember, I confessed yesterday that I mis-subtracted and I lost 3.7 pounds, not 4.7 as I originally thought. Now 4.7 would be awesome but 3.7 is still nothing to sneeze at, right? Ok, enough with the pins and needles- get on to it!

 Well, RING THE BELL!!! I lost 1.5 pounds for a total of 5.2!! YAY!! Hip hip hooray! I've lost my first 5 pounds. If I was attending WW meetings (at least from what I remember) I would be receiving a nifty bookmark with a "5" on it that I would eventually put stars on every time I get another 5 pounds lost. I may have to get myself such a bookmark and some star stickers.

 I'm super de duperty excited about losing my first 5! It's exactly what I said before- one week I lose between 2-5 pounds and the next it's always 2 pounds or less. Hopefully next week I'll lose big! Not that I'm disappointed by or ungrateful for the 1.5 loss today, because I certainly am happy. I just hope that my old pattern of weight loss keeps up. I've set a due date on my first goal for January 6th. That's still 10 weigh-weeks away. Gosh, if I keep up this 5 pounds every 2 weeks deal I'll for sure make my goal and then some! That would be sweet! Of course, I realize I'm facing the holidays during this first goal but I'm gonna stay positive! It's all I can do.

 Well, I hope everyone else is doing well! Happy Weighs Days to all and to all a good day!

Chilly Willy

 Does anyone remember that cartoon- Chilly Willy? "I'm only Chilly Willy, I'm frozen through and through. My nose is cold and my feet are froze, ha he hachoo!" I loved that cartoon. Anyhoo, I love when the weather gets chilly and you just want to snuggle up under a warm blanket (I'm boycotting those silly robe-blanket do-dads) and eat a hot bowl of chilli.

 Yet another day of Diva Dieting under my belt and Weighs Day is tomorrow! I'm certain there is a loss in my future. No, I'm not being overly optimistic. WW works, first and foremost. Also, well, you know, I might have cheated and weighed myself Sunday night. (heh heh) I have lost weight yet again. BUT, I have a confession to make. I mis-subtracted and I actually lost 3.7 pounds, not 4.7 last week. Oh well. I'm still close to 5 and I actually think I'm gonna make it tomorrow. I think now is the time to tell you all a big, fat law school secret- they don't teach us attorney-prospects any math, other than how to figure out what 1/3 of a big, fat settlement or case win is. *Greedy, Cheshire Cat-like smile spreads across Diet Diva's face* It's not my fault. They just assume you'll have people doing that for you. So, I can't be expected to know how to subtract, especially when there's a decimal point involved. Geesh.

 So, I made some outrageously good chilli last night. I've posted the recipe (may be in the process of posting) as the new recipe of the week for your interest and pleasure. Hope you all enjoy! See you back here first thing in the morning for the Weighs Day weigh-in report! Happy Tuesday!

P.S. I refuse to exercise in the dark. I will shoot for Monday.

Forget the Boy...Let's Hear It For the Girl!

That's right, folks! I made it the whole weekend and managed to stay within my points! It's quite a victory if I do say so myself. I'm really hoping for another super-sparkly kinda day on Weighs Day! Whoo hoo!

So, Friday night I made hamburgers and potato wedges that were healthy for everyone involved. I had plenty of points but still wanted to be healthy. I ate my hamburger on only half of the bun to save points. Buns can be such point-suckers! Plus, they're so bulky and I liked it better this way. Here's the recipe for my potato wedges:

Kendy's Fantastically Fat-Defying Potato Wedges

6-8 russets potatoes (depending on # of peeps and size of pots)
Butter-flavored non-stick cooking spray
Seasoning of your choice

Wash potatoes off and pierce with a fork several times. Put on glass plate and microwave for 8 minutes. Remove (be careful- those spuds are H-O-T!) Cut potatoes in half, lengthwise. Turn each half flesh side down and cut into 3 wedges, lengthwise. I usually cut those wedges in half too unless the potato was small enough that the wedges aren't too large. Now, the old recipe called for tossing in canola oil. Instead I spread the wedges all over a large baking sheet that I sprayed well with the non-stick cooking spray. Then spray over the tops of the potatoes. Season and stick in a preheated 475 degree oven, bake for 20-25 minutes or until browning. Be extra careful- I stuck my face down by the oven as I opened it once and it literally melted my mascara which fused my lashes together. That wasn't fun!

Saturday I was trying to eat very low point because I was anticipating a meal out with the family down in St. Louis. I totally stuck to my points (actually even coming in a bit under on Saturday which is a no-no). Sunday morning I ate a granola bar and drank some coffee with a bit of pumpkin spice creamer (mmmmm...mmmm). Sunday afternoon I have to say that there weren't any healthy choices for lunch, although it was an incredibly tasty meal. We ate lunch at Robb's aunt and uncle's house. So, I took small portions of stuff and ended up staying within my points. It makes me so happy to stick to my points. It's something you can really be proud about when all I said and done.

Seasoning Tip: Our household fave is Lawry's Season Salt. But, I think using some Kosher salt and some Italian Seasoning would be amazing too.

Well, my body is awake but my eyes just keep wanting to close on this dreary Monday morning. Of the past few Falls, I can say that this year's Fall has been exceptionally Fall-like. Lots of those cold, rainy days. But I'm not complaining. Last year I remember that the trees didn't really turn their vibrant colors (and I don't remember why) and this year the leaves are so incredible, don't you think?

Well, have a Happy Monday and Weighs Day is just around the corner!!

Weekend Outings- Whatchya Gonna Do When They Come For YOU?

 This weekend I will be spending a great part of it away from home. We're traveling to the St. Louis area to visit family and it's got me thinking- how do you plan when you're out of town and at the whim of those around you? It's tough to travel and stay on any weight loss plan. Grabbing a bite at any given fast food restaurant is just too easy when you're on the go. So, how do you plan? The answer is- you may not be able to plan, but you can be prepared.

 I've been thinking about how I'm going to handle it. We're leaving Saturday evening and my guess is we'll have dinner before we go, but that's not guarantee (and I'm not sure I'm even right- I left the planning up to the husband and the father-in-law and I can hear ladies the world over sighing together- NEVER let a man make the plans). So I literally have no idea how many points to plan for anything. So here is how I'm preparing:

  1. I'm taking low point granola bars with me as well as a few 100-cal snack packs. I figure I can always eat a bar for breakfast Sunday and if I'm able to eat healthier (and for less points) than I'm imagining, I can always fill in the rest of my daily points with these treats.
  2. I'm stowing away an apple or two because they're such handy treats! Plus they're filling and if we're going out to eat (and rest assured we likely will Sunday before we head home) I can eat one before we go so that I'm not starving (Read: prepared to eat a whole cow if the waitress/waiter doesn't bring the food fast enough) when we arrive.
  3. I'm taking bottled water with those fun little drink mixes that cost you no points at all. I always feel fuller and longer satisfied when I drink a bottle of water with one of those itty-bitty packets stirred in.

 I think these tips are going to carry me through the weekend! So, Happy Weekend to all, and to all a good, uh, Weekend! Meet you back here Monday morning!

 P.S. So I got these brand new, absolutely rockin' jeans that fit me oh-so-perfectly (except they're a bit long, but when you're 4-foot nuthin' that happens) and I've been shakin' my groove thang all morning! There isn't anything like a good pair of jeans!

Sleepy Daze

  First of all, I'm lodging a formal complaint (yeah, via this blog) about the date of the Daylight Savings Time change. I can no longer be expected to be awake in the complete darkness at 7am! This is outrageous. Egregious. And just plain stupid.

 Now that I've vented about that, I have to report that I greatly enjoyed my Home Run Inn pizza last night. I have been mistakenly referring to it as a Home Run pizza (well, it does knock it out of the ball park, but that's neither here nor there). So, my apologies to the makers.

 It's always exciting to me to start a new week. Especially when I've had a great weight loss from the week before to serve as the proverbial "wind beneath my wings". heh heh (I love Bette) Anyhoo, it's very motivating to have a big loss heading into a new week. This week my goal is to actually get up early (in the complete darkness) and start doing the pilates thing I said I was starting, oh, 2 weeks ago. *Kendy laughs heartily at the ridiculous notion that she will be getting up earlier in said darkness to exercise* No, really. Exercise will just help that poundage keep coming off and I know that. I'll report back about this when it happens.

 Well, Happy Thursday!

It's WEIGHS-DAY!! (Week 4)

 Good morning, good morning, one and all! Happy WEIGHS-Day! At least I hope that it is for you as much as it is for me. I've lost some poundage! Well, as you know if you've been following along you know I got off to a rough start. While I did give myself a pass last week, I did weigh Thursday morning in an unofficial capacity (Read: Off the record) I was right back where I started from. So, I'm reporting my loss based on starting weight since I didn't do so hot the past few weeks. SO....drum roll please.....*Kendy makes sad attempt to roll tongue to make drum roll sound- fails miserable*

Week 4 Loss: 4.7 pounds!!!!!  Total Loss: 4.7 lbs

 Do I get a whoop whoop? *Kendy is raising the roof in way that embarasses husband- she cares not, raising roof proudly while making "ooo ooo" sound*  Oh yeah! That's what I'm talking about people!

 Picture it. Weighs-Day morning. 7:20 am. Lone Diet Diva steps onto scales in great anticipation. She holds her breath, steps on, releases breath. Two seconds go by as slow as her mom drives. She drives really slow sometimes. But I digress. Diet Diva slowly looks down to the numbers on the scale. She can't believe her eyes! A loss! Not just any loss- a BIG loss!!! Diet Diva jumps off of scale and immediately does pathetic little I-Lost-Weight dance in itty-bitty bathroom.

 Well, tonight I will be rewarding all of my hard work by allowing myself some of my all-time favorite pizza. Happy Weighs-Day and Happy Middle-of-the-Week!

RULES OF DIET DIVA-ING

Rule #1:  If you have a lot of weight to lose (like yours truly) you are not allowed to think about the end goal. Instead, set little goals along the way, such as 10 pounds lost, or even 20 to 25 pounds. Once you get to that goal, set a new one. The weight on the scale is just a number you're working to reduce. Small goals will pave the way. Sort of like the saying "slow and steady wins the race"!

Rule #2: Once a week you have to indulge yourself. I have given myself Weighs Day. If I have a loss then I get a reward. For instance, when I step onto those gleaming, white scales tomorrow morning and I register a loss, I'm gonna reward myself with some Home Run pizza tomorrow night for dinner. You'll never have a healthy relationship with food if you can't figure out how to have things (even the "bad" things) in moderation.

Rule #3: If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. No one is ever gonna be perfect in a weight loss endeavor. If you don't believe me, read some of my posts! ~tee hee~ But you can't let that set you back permanently. You have to get up and try, try again. Forgive yourself and move forward.

Rule #4: Other people's opinions are just that- opinions- and they don't have to be YOURS! I absolutely love my family and friends, but as soon as people know you're trying to lose weight you're going to have 3 types of people in your life: 1. Those that encourage you in whatever you're doing, 2. Those that want to tell you how to lose weight because they (and their extra 20 pounds or more) know so much better than you, 3. Those that don't say anything at all. Number 1 is harmless. Those are the people that just want to support you while you figure out how to reach your goals. Number 3 depends- if you need their support it can be hard to go on without it, but go on you must. Number 2 (labeled such for a reason- we'll call them "the poops") are those that can do the worst damage. They don't just offer advice or encouragement. No, they want to tell you why the course you've chosen is wrong and what to do to make it right. Avoid "the poops" at all costs!

Rule #5: You have to figure out why you want to lose weight and THAT has to involve YOUR decision. Not because you want some poop off your back. You have to want it for you and your own reasons. Not for anyone else. For me, I have two extremely and equally important reasons. (This is taking a whole heap of courage to be honest here.) First of all, I have struggled with my weight up's and down's my whole life. The first time I was put on diet pills I was 12 and about 10 pounds too heavy. At the time, I thought I was really fat. That's because the standard that I was led to believe was appropriate was "anorexic thin" (do I hear a big, fat sigh all around?). As a 12-year old I knew nothing better. Today, I see that this is where the downfall began. Over the years I've tried starvation, self-induced vomiting, diet pills galore, and even self injury. This is hugely painful to me even today at the ripe, young age of 32. With all of my heart and soul I do not want Lainie to experience even one single second of that pain. I want her to be a confident, happy, healthy child, girl, and woman. I want her to have a healthy relationship with food and an accurate body perception (things I never had). Secondly, I hate the way this weight makes me feel- physically, emotionally, mentally. I need this. And, finally, I really want this. Those are my reasons. You have to choose your own and let those be the only reasons.

So speaks the Diet Diva. Happy Tuesday! See you back here tomorrow morning for *so exciting* WEIGHS DAY!!!

The Diet Diva Rules

  That's right, folks! I have managed to stay within my points range all weekend. That makes for 4 days straight! It's really motivating once you get a day under your belt. And then two days. Then three. And four. Yeah, I know, you get the point.

  I won't bore you to tears with every last detail of my diet diary (although it's way fun to write it all out each day and then to look back and realize that I actually get to EAT and still lose weight). I do want to share one situation with you in which I triumphed magnificently.

 Picture it! Friday. October 16, 2009. A lone Diet Diva home taking care of her sick baby. Along comes Mr. T (Temptation, that is- not the blinged out, A-Team variety) knocking at my door. "You know," he says to me in his smoothly sinister voice, "you owe it to yourself not to cook right now. You have a baby to take care of. Just throw that other Home Run pizza in your oven and feast on the ever-loving, cheesy goodness." My mouth began salivating. I could hear my heart pounding at the thought of the cheesy goo, the gumminess of the crust just beneath the perfect sauce, the flakiness of the crusty bottom and the crunch of the outer crust. I snapped myself back to my senses. "But," said I, "I have already calculated all of my points for today. Plus I'm having Olive Garden tonight which will be a super filling meal. I have it all figured out. If I eat the pizza, that will throw it all off! Plus, I've already started thawing out a chicken breast for lunch." Confidence began to build as I stood proud of the fight I was waging against Mr. T, but he would not give up so easily. "That's right. You should cook that chicken breast. You were gonna share it with Lainie. Why don't you give what she doesn't eat to Tank? It'd be a tasty treat for him. No one needs to know that you ate pizza instead," said he. My heart was racing furiously as I began debating within myself. I already had one day of perfect pointing under my belt. It would all be for nothing if I gave in now. "NO!" I shouted, instantly seeing the despairing look of defeat as I stared down Mr. T. "First of all, the only reason for cooking a pizza is the convenience and if I'm cooking the chicken breast anyway, this makes no sense at all. Forget not, Mr. T, you are dealing with a lawyer. Secondly, I cannot lie about what I eat. I would have to report back to my faithful bloggorters (blog supporters- tee hee) that I had done such a deed and I would be so disappointed in myself."

 I won the battle! I did not eat the pizza. It still sits in my freezer, waiting for that special occasion when I will break it out and enjoy it guilt-free. Instead I did cook that chicken breast and a bag of california mix veggies (broccoli, cauliflower, and carrots) and shared it all with Lainie. I could be proud of myself for not giving in to Mr. T. Next time he struts his stuff up to my door step and knocks, thinking he's gonna win a war he's waged against me, I'll be ready for him!

 Have a great week and Happy Eating!

I Am the Point Queen!

  Ok, you're so not gonna believe this. I mean, really, not believe this. Well, we had plans to go to Olive Garden last night so I went to their website, on which they've posted nutritional values for EV-RY-THA-NG-UH. I went through and figured out points for my faves. I knew I wanted salad and I figured up how much I could have. Then I knew I'd want a breadstick or 2. I also usually like the alfredo dipping sauce for the breadsticks so I calculated even that. Finally, the entre! Well, my second fave dish is the Ravioli di Portabello and if I got a lunch portion it was 10 points. Note: my FAVE dish is the Shrimp and Chicken Carbonara which is to die for- maybe literally- the point value for this dish is screamin' off the charts, so I skipped it. I actually figured out exactly how many points I'd need to OG. I even figured up how many more points it would be if my hubby and I decided to split a piece of the Pumpkin Cheesecake as a Bday treat to me. (Do you love how I'm draggin my birthday out as long as possible? Yeah, me too.) I knew I had some points left over so I had to use them wisely. I ate lots of free stuff like broccoli and cauliflower (which also means I got my veggies in- yay me!) I was the POINT QUEEN. Seriously.

  Having two days in a row where I have successfully planned my points and stayed within them amazes me, but also inspires me. I'm doing gud! Rally gud!

  I'm hoping this coming Weighs Day proves to be a sparkly, weight-loss kind of day! Yee haw! Have a good weekend folks. I'll see ya Monday!

Successful Squashfest

  Well, finally! I stayed entirely within my allotted points for the day! Whoo hoo! Can I get a "wut wut"? Anyway, it was an incredibly successful day and I owe it all to that little task called P-L-A-N-N-I-N-G!! *Kendy raises roof in most out-of-date fashion*

  Just to briefly recap my day, I ate a cinnamon granola bar for breakfast with a bit of caffeinie juice (Read: coff-ay). I then ate some muy delicioso Santa Fe Rice and Beans (WW meal, if you will). For a mid-morning snack I had a serving of RF Triscuits. Late afternoon snack was some popcorn and my one Coke of the day. For dinner (and I'll go into dets about this below), I had a chicken breast and butternut squash fries (that I shared with Lainie and she munched like a rock star). For an appetizer I had some "fried" zucchini. Then, with my left over points, I enjoyed two Little Debbie 100-cal snack cakes (2pts each) and a cup of hot Blueberry-flavored tea. Mmmm mmmm good.

 Ok, so the butternut squash fries were fan-flippin'-tastic! Try them. Go right now and buy yourself a butternut squash and go home and make these delectable goodies immediately. Here's how it goes-

1. Buy beautiful butternut squash and take home. Preheat oven to 425 degrees.
2. Cut in half. If you are a large family, use both halves, otherwise, save the other half for another batch tomorrrow. (Trust me. You'll want more.)
3. Peel outside and deseed- BS has a small pocket with seeds and strings not unlike a pumpkin.
4. Cut into fry shapes. I used my fantastical Crinkle Cutter from Pampered Chef to make them look like fries. TIP: although you may be tempted to cut them small- DO NOT. Cut them larger because they shrink up alot. Using a Crinkle Cutter they look like little cheesy fries. So adorable.
5. Spray cookie sheet with non-stick cooking spray- BE GENEROUS. These babies stick. You have to flip them half way through the baking process and if they stick they are near impossible to flip without destroying them.
6. Place gorgeous, butternut squash fries all over cookie sheet. Spray squash lightly with non-stick cooking spray and sprinkle with Kosher salt. NOTE: A little salt goes a long way. Be careful.
7. Bake for 40 minutes. Halfway through, flip them. EXTRA NOTE: If your fries are sticking when you go to flip and they are falling apart, just don't flip them. That's what I did and they still turned out awesome.
8. Remove from oven and remove from sheet. Eat. Enjoy.

  I dipped mine in ketchup per Hungry Girl's suggestion and I thought I was enjoying a real french fry. So yummy in my tummy. Plus, the plumper ones (Read: the ones I didn't cut too small) were soft and I gave those to Lainie. She absolutely loved them. She also ate chicken with me, but she actually signed for more  (yes, as in sign language- she knows how to sign "more"- genius baby) and I think she was wanting some butternut love!

 I have to tell you that it felt good. I mean, real good. Hey everyone! Come see how good I feel! (Silly parlay into an Anchorman: Legend of Ron Burgundy quote- my apologies) What I mean to say is- I'm back. Having such a kick rear-end day yesterday with following my points to a proverbial "t" is really motivating. I'm back on track and I'm ready for some weight loss next Wednesday!

 Silly internet is still down at home which means I'll probably be silent this weekend, unless I figure out how to post from my cell phone. The world of technology amazes me to no end. Anyway, have a wonderful weekend! Hoping you have a squashfest of your own soon. Let me know how you like the Butternut Squash fries! Oh, and I saved that other half for this weekend. Woo hoo! Happy Eating!

 (P.S. Robb did try one BS fry. Hated it. At least he tried one. C'est la vie.)

Tonight is the Night!

   I woke up this morning and I just feel  like I can really do this. I can knock this one right out of the park. To quote Mary-Kate or Ashley (who can keep them straight) in the movie It Takes Two- It's gonna be a "can't eat, can't sleep, homerun, over the fence, world series kind of thing". (Hmm...they were actually talking about true love- ah, well) Yeah, I realize I just quoted an Olsen Twin, but in all honesty I love their movies from their tween years. Actually, It Takes Two is even ealier. I even subscribed to their magazine during it's very brief run. Mmmm hmmm. Yeah, I did. Please don't do the math on what age that would have made me at the time.

  So, tonight I'm going to finally make Butternut Squash "fries". I can't even begin to tell you how excited I am to finally have these things. Whoo hoo! I'm also going to be "frying" up some zucchini! It's going to be a squashtastic night. I'm hoping Little Miss Lou Lou will consider sampling these treats. I can almost positively count on Robb NOT to try them. He's just not adventurous when it comes to food. Boo! With my squash I'll be having a chicken breast, lightly seasoned. So yummy. I'm salivating right now just dreaming about it. What time is it?

 I have vowed that starting Monday morning I'm going to get up early and I'm going to partake in some Denise Austin pilates. Oh yeah. That's right. I think adding in some exercise will fuel me for the day.

 I've been eating healthier for sure. I take a fruit with me to work each day for a snack. I've been eating granola bars for breakfast (the VERY SAME ONES that I ate for breakfast when I had my first 40 pound weight loss with WW) and that is super encouraging. I also try to get in veggies as much as possible, although I have to admit, I'm not as successful at that as I'd like to be. Tonight, I'm all about the veggies. Boohyah!

 So, this is Day One of Week 4 and I can honestly say that I have all of my points mapped out for the day. Well, all of them except for the 8 leftover for goodies. Ooh la la! I have to enjoy these points now because I actually get 5 extra points because I'm still nursing Lainie. Come November 11th, I'm done! Hip hip hooray! However, I lose those 5 points at that time, so I'm gonna make the most of them now! Yee haw!

 It always feels so much easier when I plan. I think that's key to this being successful.

 Happy Eating! Happy Thursday! Happy Weight-Loss-That-Will-Come-Next-Wednesday! It's gonna be a Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious kind of day.

It's Breaks Day

  So, anyone who read this blog thingy knows that I've sort of had some setbacks of late. I'm not beating myself up because these things happen. For me, to continue blogging means that I have definitely not given up and that, for me, is the most important thing. Admitting stuff actually helps. Today is my normal weigh day and I've decided to give myself a birthday gift (though a day late) and give myself a pass for the week. Weight Watchers has such passes when you attend meetings. You just turn one in and you don't have to weigh. I'm doing well. Yesterday I took a granola bar for breakfast, ate a WW meal for lunch, and had a banana as a snack. We had tacos for dinner but even that wasn't terrible because I still had plenty of points. For my birthday cake I ate 2 100-calorie Little Debbie snack cakes! I even did well there!

  So, I'm charging on. I'm also about to leave for Joliet, IL which is about a 3 hour drive so that's gonna be all for the day. I just wanna leave you with this thought- we're human. We are gonna make mistakes and sometimes making the right choices in any area of our lives can be a difficult and daunting task. Especially, women out there. We seem to take it upon ourselves to be the caretakers, to be the ones to sacrifice. So, when we find that our motivation is lacking and our calorie intake is higher than we anticipated/hoped/want, it's important to do two things- 1. forgive yourself, not beating yourself up and 2. never quit- get right back up and move forward.

  Have a great day!

I'm Ba-a-a-a-ack!

  So, after a whole weekend of silence, I'm back. Have you ever had one of those days where you have all of these plans and you accomplish none of them? Yeah? Well, that was my entire weekend. That's not to say it was a bad weekend. Far from it! But, I accomplished nothing I wanted to.

 Friday evening was fine and all. I made this awesome chicken and stuffing casserole. You cut up raw chicken into bite-sized pieces and cover the bottom of a casserole dish with them. Then you take a can or two of either Healthy Request cream of chicken or mushroom soup and spread over the top of the chicken. The recipe actually calls for you adding 1/3 cup of fat free sour cream to the "cream of" business, but I always skip that step. This time I actually mixed cream of chicken and mushroom together. Ok, in the meantime, you take a box of stuffing and pour it into a bowl with 1 and 2/3 cups of very hot water and let that stand about 5 minutes. You spread the stuffing all over the top of the "cream of business" and bake it for about 20-30 minutes at 350 degrees. Super yummy, super filling, super low fat! Heats up well the next day too.

  I also sliced a zucchini up and "fried" it in some Pam. Actually, I took some Pam for baking (because it has flour in it) spraying the slices front and back, dipped them quickly in some flour (it stuck because of the spray) and "fried" in some Pam. Good eats!

 Enter: Saturday. Well, the mom and grandma came to town to take me to Red Lobster for my birthday (which is today). I didn't go overboard at all and walked away very proud of myself. I didn't feel over-full at all and that's saying a lot because, well, IT'S RED LOBSTER FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. I have no recollection right now of what I had for dinner Saturday night, but I did not end up having time to make any squash recipes because of said visit from the folks and the light shopping that followed.

 Enter: Sunday. Ok, so we had the best of intentions, right? Get up, go to church, come home and read the paper. I still needed to secure some spaghetti squash for my squash-fest so I would go to the grocery store, come home, and start whipping up some squash-tastic recipes. (heh heh) Well, Saturday night Lainie fussed on and off until after 2 in the morning. So, her exhausted parents skipped church (whoever those hethens are- tisk tisk- ok it was us) and lounged about all morning. Robb ran to get a paper and some breakfast from Hardees. Yes, I said Hardees. Yes, I did have biscuits and gravy. Yes, I also had hashrounds. Yes, I felt very guilty about said biscuits, gravy, and hashrounds. Well, Robb said because he is starting the healthy eating adventure with me as of Monday (yesterday) morning, he wanted to go out with a bang. (Yes, feeble attempt at a justification, but there you have it.) This is about the time that he concocted dinner plans that included Cracker Barrell. My knees wobbled and I accepted. I got ready and went to the grocery store (securing said spaghetti squash- finally!) and got home in the knick of time to go visit Bella. We left her house and went to CB, which was fan-flippin'-tastic, if I did splurge so myself. Again, I did not eat until the button shot off my pants and injured someone, so I felt a bit victorious. I picked up a few presents in the gift shop and we went home, the thoughts of a new day before us.

  Enter: Monday. The plan of action was to spend the morning cleaning whlie Robb was still at home to keep an eye on the Lainie-bug. Then I was going to spend the entire afternoon in my squash laboratory, experimenting with new recipes. Well, most of the cleaning got done. I fed Lainie lunch and was going to get her down for a nap while I started working on the squash. I picked her up from her high chair and she was burning up. I took her temp and she was running a fever. She was also getting a bit fussy. So I sat down and held her and rubbed her head and she slept on and off for about 4 hours while I held her. I wanted her to rest and knew she wouldn't if I laid her down. She woke up around 5:30 and seemed a relatively happy, if not still half asleep, baby and began to play. Well, by that time my plans were shot and I didn't even cook dinner. Actually, I have to back up slightly. Around 11, I was starving and decided to make a Home Run pizza (best pizza ever) and I figured on having 2 slices for 4 pts each and then having a feast of squash for dinner. Well, 2 slices turned into 3. Then 4, as if maybe I was a bottomless pit of hunger. After Lainie woke up I started cleaning a bit more and had a slice of pizza while I worked away. At 7, when I realized I had given up all hope of making any type of dinner, I ate the last 3 pieces. Yes, I consumed an entire pizza (frozen pizza so not ginormous or anything- sad attempts to justify here, no?). So, 8 slices of pizza at 4 pts a pop and I was over my daily points. Of course, there are always flexers available, but it still disheartens me so.

 But, today is a fresh start for me. So far, so good. As of today I'm 29 years old (oh, yes I am- granted it's like the 3rd anniversary, but I'm still 29) and this is my year. I just know it. And that squash fest will happen this week, have no fears. I will report back!

 Happy Tuesday! Tommorrow is Weighs-Day. Expecting another gain, but maybe in the spirit of my birthday the scales will decide not to be cruel to a heart that's true. If only.

C'est la vie

  TGIF and such. Etc. Another rainy, blustery Fall day. I don't mean that as a complaint about the weather, but rather the fact that I am not at home, snuggled under a blanket, reading a book, sipping hot chocolate, and intermittently napping. Doesn't that sound like the perfect Fall day. I'm hearing that tomorrow is supposed to be a lovely day. Of course it. Having these blustery, comatose days through the week is like getting sick on the weekend. Just ruins everything.

  But this is not a Weather Channel blog. This is the Diet Diva's blog. I'm here to report that I did not do quite as well as I would have liked to do yesterday. Well, I ate pizza for breakfast and lunch again- boo! I also snacked on some popcorn. For dinner I did pretty well. I made some oven-baked potato wedges and lean steak. That wasn't so bad. So, I'm doing ok. Not great. But ok

  This weekend I'm trying out a squash casserole recipe and experimenting with making "fried" zucchini in a more, shall we say, figure-friendly way. I've got some beautiful zucchs, a couple of yellow squash, a green and a red pepper, and butternut squash. I'm going to go pick up a spaghetti squash probably tomorrow. That will be the basis for my casserole. Has anyone ever had spaghetti squash? Let me tell you about it.

 First of all, points-wise it's free. It's rather large and it's a pale yellow color. It reminds me of a cross between a tall, skinnier pumpkin and a butternut squash. It's sort of the shape of a taller, skinnier pumpkin and has a stem, but it's skin is smooth like butternut squash. It's really user-friendly too, once you get the spaghetti-like flesh out. Here's what you do- lay it on a dish towel so it doesn't try to move away from you (they're sneaky devils, I tell ya) and slice off the top to remove the stem area and cut the bottom off too. Then slice it long-ways straight down the middle. Add a couple tablespoons of water to a large, microwave-safe plate and put the spagh-squash flesh side down on the plate. Microwave for around 10 minutes. Pull it out- be EXTRA careful because the squash AND the plate will be mad hot. Take a fork and rake it straight down, long-ways, through the flesh. What you will discover is that it actually comes off in long, stringy pieces, much like spaghetti.

 After that you can use it in recipes. You can replace pasta with this squash in just about any dish. Just be sure to pat it dry really well. I like to add it to a frying pan with a bit of non-stick cooking spray and season it with creole spices and "fry" it. I then add some cooked salad shrimp to it. You can use what you want. I've used it in casseroles and just eaten it by itself, seasoned.

  It's pretty tasty, easy to use, and, did I mention, it's free! Try it out some time. This weekend I'm also going to make some baked butternut squash fries. I got the recipe from Hungry Girl and people rave about it. She also has a super yummy butternut squash hashbrowns recipe that I'm dying to try. I'll report back soon with how all of my squash dishes turn out this weekend. Stay tuned and in the meantime, have a fant-abulous weekend, folks!

Bipolar Weather, Bipolar Diet

  I think Mother Nature is having a bit of a hormonal imbalance this week. One day it's raining, the next is sunshiney, and the next it's blustery (thanks, Nancy, for the word) cold and rainy again. She just can't make up her mind. So it is with this diet, er, journey. One day I'm dedicated, devout Diet Diva. The next I'm the coveting, cowardly Cake-eater! What IS the matter with me? Before you jump to the hormonal imbalance theory I waged for MNat, please consider that perhaps it's just a matter of adjustment.

 I have read many an article that stresses the importance of being ready to lose weight before you begin trying. The more you fail the more likely you are to fail again, to be discouraged and depressed. Well, I've got news for them! I was BORN ready. So, why the struggle? Well, I've been a bit, shall we say, melancholy lately and I didn't realize it until Robb continually asked me yesterday what was wrong. I couldn't exactly put my finger on it. I wasn't necessarily tired. I feel fine. I wasn't angry at him (although I'm sure if pushed, I could come up with something- haha). I just feel, blah. Could it be MNat's bipolar weather of late? Actually, I don't think so.

 It's really hard to cook the meals you want to cook and plan the way you need to plan when you are now imposing your journey onto someone else. So I talked it over with Robb and I figured out that what I need is to be able to be a bit, well, selfish. I'm going to have to start being able to cook the healthy foods I crave, that make it easier for me, even if he doesn't like them. His response- do it. If he doesn't like what I'm making he'll make himself something else. Now, how is THAT for support?! It never occurred to me that we could eat different things for dinner (and you know something, it isn't rocket science, for crying out loud- I think I could have figured this out before). To further aid me in my endeavors, he has decided that he, too, will begin a regimen of eating healthier and exercising. Much to my surprise (and leaving me slightly chagrined) he has decided we will start getting up earlier as of Monday morning and we will both exercise. We don't have to do the same thing, but we will do it, nonetheless.

 I'll have to report back Tuesday to see if he survives stealing what precious-little sleep I currently get now. Will he survive? Will I actually exercise? Will MNat ever get her hormones in check? I don't know. It's a mystery. 10-4, over and out.

P.S. I will be back tomorrow, fear not.

It's WEIGHS-Day (Week 3)

  Raise the roof if you weighed today even though you knew you'd have a gain because you stuffed yourself full of s'mores all weekend! *Kendy raises roof*

  I was right- I did have a gain. I gained 1.7 pounds. Not horrible, all things considered. I mean, I sort of went off-roading for four days. Robb had a serious talk with me last night about how it was nice and all having 4 bags of Halloween candy around (honest, it wasn't all for me- I don't even like Snickers or Reese's.....much) but we need to not have that around. I'm not alone in my chocolate obsession. The man ate an entire bag of Milk Duds all by himself within a day and a half. Not to mention at least half a bag of Snickers. Boo!

  So, today is all about making good choices. For instance, I made the good choice not to call in sick to work because I'm not sick, I'm just tired. I made the good choice not to injure Robb as he told Lainie that she sounds just like Mommy, how she babbles all the time (jerk face). I also made the good choice not to bring a soda to work with me today which will force me to drink water all day (well, notwithstanding the one- and I do mean one- cup of coffee I have each morning). That was probably the best choice I made this morning. *Kendy pats her own back*

  So, tell me- how is everyone else doing? Honesty actually helps. I mean, I have had to 'fess up that I ate a ton of s'mores and chocolate and then got "back on track" by consuming cinnamon melts and a hashbrown Monday morning. These things happen, folks! No sense in beating yourself up. If you have triumphs or tragedies, let me know!

  Happy Weighs-Day!

New Day, New Diva

  So, I woke up this morning feeling rather diva-licious. It's a new day and a fresh start on my journey. With my set back set aside, I'm ready to go. Maybe it was getting an adequate amount of sleep last night (which rarely happnes these days) but I woke up feeling energized and, well, like a diva. I even shaved my legs!

 I've actually got a plan of action for the day and I'm gonna stick to it. All of my points are accounted for and that's a good thing. I know exactly when I get a snack and I even figured in 2 points for one (I promise, just ONE) snack-sized Hershey bar. That way, I get my chocolate fix. I know it's coming and it's figured in with the rest of my points, so I'm all set.

 This is what I need. I need the structure of planning out my points. While others may do better with not planning out things so much, it's best for me. That's the point, to find out what works for Y-O-U! 

 So, Happy Tuesday, from the Diet Diva!

Brutal Honesty

  Ok, so when I started this blog the one thing I promised was that I would be honest no matter what. If I'm going to be a woman of my word then here goes. First of all, we ordered pizza Thursday night and it was MY idea. What was I thinking? I'll tell you what I was thinking- I love pizza! Well, I did have plenty of points for it, so I decided it wasn't so horrible. Then came Friday morning- pizza for breakfast. Friday afternoon- pizza for lunch. Ridiculousness. I ate the left overs for breakfast and lunch the next day. Ok, again, I actually stayed within points, but didn't feel so great about it. So, in my depression I did the exact opposite of what I should do. It's sort of like when Jonah was all, "Sure God, I'll go to Nineveh. NOT!" He proceeded to go the opposite direction landing himself right, smack-dab in the middle of a whale. Well, I'm gonna BE a whale if I keep doing this. See, I went the opposite direction and landed smack-dab in the middle of the candy aisle at Target where I proceeded to buy chocolate bars, marshmallows and graham crackers. "It's not for me," I lied to myself, "It's for Emily and I to make together. I'll only eat one." Did I really mean "times 10"? Because I didn't stop at one. And when I was done with the s'mores I ate the chocolate. Woe is me.

 Other than my s'mores debacle, I actually ate rather healthy. Friday night for dinner I shared brussels sprouts with Lainie. I made a very healthy version of chicken and dumplings for dinner Saturday night which I had left over on Sunday. As I went to bed last night I had visions of broccoli stalks dancing in my head and I swore that I would get back on track first thing this morning. I woke up with a killer headache which drove me to McD's for a large hazelnut coffee, which "magically" came with an order of cinnamon melts and one hashbrown. Lord, have mercy. I know I didn't order those things- did I? Mmmmm...hmmmmm. Sure did.

  You know something? It happens. I debated with myself after consuming said cinnamon melts and one hashbrown about just not blogging anymore. Giving up. Then I remembered my promise. After all, I wouldn't be in this mess if I didn't have an unhealthy relationship with food so a set back here and there is just gonna have to be acceptable. AND, I'm going to have to move forward regardless. Yeah, I will possibly have a weight gain for the week and you know something, it's ok. I faced it like a champ, I think, and I learned.

 So, onward I go.

Working for the Weekend

  Well, folks, it's FRIDAY!!!! TGIF!! And such. Anyway, we're approaching the weekend and I have to say that I've been struggling the past couple of days. After being super happy that I lost this week, I sure haven't been staying on track very well. Of course, it always seems that way when I'm constantly on the go, and I have been a'movin! Last night, I did the unthinkable- we ordered pizza. Ridiculousness. I knew better. But fear not! This broad is getting back on the straight and narrow as we speak. It's all about planning. You just have to plan!

 This weekend I'll probably be cleaning the house and staying busy is key. Isn't there a saying- idle hands are the devil's workshop or some business like that? Well, these fingers are gonna be scrubbing away the grime this weekend. Robb also happened upon free tickets to the Jr. Blues tomorrow night so we're doing that as well. Lainie will be attending her first hockey game. Whoo hoo!

 Ok, I'll report back in tomorrow with this getting-back-on-track business. I'm Supergirl! And.....I'm off!

An Apple A Day

 Happy Thursday to all and to all a good, um, day? Well, it's Fall. I mean, yeah, it was official like a week ago, but today feels like Fall. The crisp cool air, hazy and rainy, leaves are a'changin'- yup! Fall....ahhhhhhh. Breathe it in. With Fall comes so many good things- pumpkins and colors and hay rides and bonfires and s'mores (I will be working on a LF version, have not a fear) and then the holidays. This is my favorite time of the year. And for some odd reason, it is always the best time for me to kick start my diet.

 Sure, I'm aware that there are nasty temptations just waiting to plead with me to be eaten. Why, there's already caramel apples (which I've almost convinced myself is a healthy product- after all, the bulk of the treat is an apple and those are healthy) and apple cider out there. Of course, stores these days start stocking the shelves full of Halloween goodies the minute the 4th of July is over (some stores really do this and it's a little much, if you ask me). Then, the holidays. And not just any holidays- we're talkin' about the biggies here, folks! Thanksgiving and Christmas. I'm pretty sure that the national average for pounds gained between November and January is somewhere around a million pounds per person.

 So, it does seem insane that this of all times, is the time of the year during which I'm most likely to get on track with WW, but true it be. See, there are so many tasty morsels you can enjoy while not adding to your waistline. Pumpkin-based items are a hit during the season and you can do so much with pumpkin. From Autumn Muffins (the recipe of the week last week), Impossible Pumpkin Pie (it's a LF treat and I'll post the recipe this month), Pumpkin Soup (which if made right, can be nearly no points) and Pumpkin bread (this last one is the most challenging to de-fat and de-calorize, but it CAN be done). 

 This month, it is my goal to make at least one pumpkin-based item each week and make it LF. If you have recipes that you want me to work on or suggestions for already-LF recipes, send them my way! Whoever submits the best recipe wins a prize (shhh...don't tell them it's a thumbs up and a shout out on my blog! tee hee).

 Here's to Fall...Here's to you All!

Weighs-Day (Week 2)

  Today is the day! It's WEIGHS-Day! Week 2 is done and despite my frights from the day yester, I did, in fact, lose. Not much, but it's a loss! Not a gain! Not maintenance! Super happy about that!!!! I lost .3 pounds for a total of 3 pounds lost. Now, that's not fantastic. But the scales are heading south and that's all that matters to me.

  My biggest challenges so far have been evenings. During the day I eat very healthy. I'm fortunate to work at a place that considers purchasing water bottles for the office a luxury. We each take turns buying coffee, for crying out loud. So, there is no food or beverage around to tempt me. However, I think I'm not taking enough food during the day. I usually have something very healthy for breakfast, like my sacred VitaTops or Vita Brownies (did I mention they make brownies too? Delish!) and a cup of coffee with a bit of sugar. Then for lunch I either have a sandwich or WW frozen meal. I do have some healthy snack options like popcorn and whole wheat Goldfish. But I'm usually so busy I don't eat a snack. By the time I get home I'm ravenously hungry and I have a tendency to snack before and/or while I cook dinner. Therein lies my problem. I think I snack too much and don't realize that I am.

 When I attended meetings they always said, "If you bite it, write it." Well, those before-dinner snacks don't always getting written, even though they do get bitten. (heh heh) So, I need to be more faithful in writing everything that I eat. Plus, it helps me looking back at my points trackers to see the weeks I lose more, what I did differently. Sometimes, I've just made healthier choice. Sometimes there's nothing to which I can pinpoint weight loss differences. Also, I have always noticed a weight loss pattern. It seems like one week I'll lose 2-4 pounds and the next is a pound or less. So, while I only lost .3 pounds this week, that's actually typical and means that I'm on track.

 How is everyone else doing? Has anyone had any success with weight loss? If anyone has any tips they want to share, email me. I will add them to my postings but I won't take the credit- I promise!!

 Happy Weighs Day!

Dieting and Baby Blues

  Well, tomorrow is the infamous Weighs-day and to be completely honest, I'm not feeling it. I just feel so blah. Maybe it's because I'm depressed about my daycare situation that I feel blah. But I have this feeling that I probably haven't lost weight this week. I try desperately to convince myself that if I can even maintain for a week, that's better than gaining. Ok, technically, that's accurate. However, it doesn't make anything feel any better. I just started this thing so I feel like I shouldn't have a non-loss week for, like, ever!

 In reflection of the week, I can't say that I've been horrible. I've managed to stay within my point range. I mean, yeah, I used all of my flex points for the week, but you can. I'm hoping it's just me and that the scales will tell a tale that makes a liar of me. Even a pound and I'd be happy. Que sera sera.

 So, the depressing daycare debacle. Robb started work today at a car dealership here in town. While this is good for lots of reasons (no travel to and from J'ville for work, saving gas money, etc.), this just happened Thursday so I've been scrambling to find daycare for Lainie here in town. We've interviewed a couple of people. It's one of those things that I just think only a mom can truly appreciate. When choosing daycare for your baby you have to stop and realize that she will be with this person 4 days a week (Robb has one day off through the week and he will keep her) for at least 8 hours a day. So, you have to choose someone you think will nurture and love your baby like you would, while giving her structure too (which we had with our friend in J'ville who was watching Lainie). It's impossible. Last night we met two ladies- one was very reasonably priced and I just do not have a good feeling about her (and a mom's instincts should never be countered); the other is too expensive but would be a really great fit. Impossible! Such is life.

 So really, I keep thinking/wishing/praying for/desperately trying to send telepathic messages to WW, so that WW would read my blog, love it, and hire me to blog on their website and be the new spokesperson. See, here's my theory- would you rather have someone who's already lost the weight or someone that you can lose weight with? Well, my personal opinion is that it would be fun for WW to do as other, not-to-be-named companies have done- get someone who has to lose weight and keep checking in with them on their weight loss. Well, I just know I'm supposed to be famous anyway (tee hee!) and I think WW should consider me. =)  I'm ready anytime, WW Powers-That-Be!

 Ok, so, I hope everyone has had a good weight loss week. We'll find out tomorrow. Happy Tuesday!

Holy Fried Chicken and Pizza, Batman!

  I've been out of commission for a few days, but gone in form is not gone in spirit! I was visiting with family this weekend and, though I used every last shred of flex points I had left, I still maintained my points. I had lunch with my bff, Cara, on Saturday at Applebee's and I have to tell you that their Steak and Portabello WW menu item is wonderful. I mean, seriously, it might be the smallest steak I've ever eaten in my life, but it turned out to be just enough when paired with the mushrooms, potatoes, and broccoli. Y-U-M!

 So, prior to starting this whole blog-for-accountability deal, I had requested my mom make fried chicken for dinnner. My mom had already made purchases for the meal so I decided not to back out. I just had to save plenty of points and the flexers, for said meal. It was really good and while I did have a small amount of seconds, I def stayed within my points.

 Sunday morning (despite the best efforts of my mother, the food pusher- I love ya, Ma!) I did NOT eat French toast OR bacon OR eggs of any variety. I needed to watch the points since I was out of the flexers, so I did not partake in those goodies. Now, please don't think I condone never having such tasty treats. It's just that we were having homemade pizza for lunch since my lil' bro was there and I had to save points for that. So, I planned. Planning is key for this program. All in all, I probably could have done a bit better (like, I always hate when I spend all of my flex points in one day), but I feel pretty good about staying in line with the points I had.

 Wednesday is just around the corner and I'm not gonna cheat this week by weighing early. NOPE! I'm waiting (mostly because I'm slightly afeared that I'll step on to discover that the fried chicken and pizza are still attached to me and I've gained that 2.7 pounds back. Here's hoping for the best! Have a great week to all and don't forget to keep me posted on your own endeavors!

TGIF, Baby!

  So ends another week. I woke up this morning with a pounding headache and this coffee is doing little to soothe it. But that's not what you want to know about, you want to know if I've fallen off of the proverbial wagon (diet-wagon, that is). Well, the answer is a resounding- NO! But I was absent yesterday.

  So, Wednesday night I made a super-delish, lowfat Chicken Alfredo (I realize that Low Fat and Alfredo in the same sentence seems a mite dangerous, but I assure you, my version is healthy and yummilicious!). We had something to celebrate, after all- my 2.7 pound weight loss. Yes, in the grand scheme of things it's the tiny droplet on the top of the tip of the iceberg in my weight loss endeavor. But it's a good start. And I was thrilled.

  Yesterday I got up at the butt-crack of dawn (and really, who likes to see any butt cracks? I ask you! Even if it does belong to dawn.) and drove down to Marion, IL for a meeting which lasted entirely too long. I have to tell you that I did consume a brownie and it was maybe the most delicious brownie of my still-kind-of-young-but-not-as-young-as-I-used-to-be young life. Oh, yes, and I most certainly did count the points. I did go over points yesterday but, ahhhhh, that, my friend, is what those sweet flex points are all about. Flex points- 35 extra points a week that don't carry over- so use 'em or lose 'em. Well, I used a few yesterday, but not as many as one might assume.

 So, I'm going to Quincy this weekend and it's gonna be a fight to stay within points. First of all, my mother (saint that she is) is making fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and corn. Let's see, I think that'll take, yes, most of my points for the day. I guess I'm having green beans and pickles until dinner. To be fair, this meal was due to my own request which was actually made prior to starting this whole blog/weight loss journey. But I will be fine and I will go on.

 Have a great weekend! Keep those updates a'comin'!

It's WEIGHS-Day!!! (Week One)

  So, I woke up this morning and shot straight out of bed and went to the scales. Ok, actually, first I had to empty the bladder because I was not about to let that 5 ounces hinder a bigger weight loss on the scales. I stepped on in joyful anticipation and BOO-YAH! I lost 2.7 pounds! Whoo hoo!!! Oh yeah oh yeah! Jump around! I'm dying to know if anyone else weighed in today. Please let me know!

  Yesterday I did pretty darn good on the point-o-meter! I was really watching it because I knew today was the day and I was not about to let anything interfere with my weigh-in. I had a VitaTop for breakfast, some whole wheat Goldfish (yes the crackers, no not the fish although that would've been a score for protein) as a snack, and a Healthy Choice meal for lunch. Dinner, well, we had a dinner meeting for work and I actually ordered a horseshoe for dinner. Side Note: For those of you who have never met said Horseshoe, allow me to introduce you. First, toast a piece of bread. Lay that on a plate. Then add your meat (in my case it was fried chicken tenders which was meant to be a fried tenderloin but someone got confused in the ole kitch). A classic horse would have a burger. Then you top that with loads of fries. Then you smother it in cheese. Horseshoe, meet thighs. Thighs, meet Horseshoe. You get the pic.

 Yeah, so back to the order. I know what you're thinking- "what were YOU thinking??" Well, look. The mighty horse is a force to be reckoned with and the pub we were at is one of the top spots in Spfld for a horse. It's the sort of thing that makes a girl's knees wobble a bit. You're overcome with the flavors in your mind and you just have to do it. Well, before you throw all of your respect for me out the window I have to tell you that I ordered it to go because it was getting late and when I got home my senses returned to me and Robb ate it. Well, I had a few fries with cheese but then I ate popcorn and called it a night. SEE! I didn't do so bad after all.

  And so we begin, Week Two!!! Hoooray!

I Was An Angry Elf...

Ugh, so I had a bad night last night. Well, a Board meeting. I can't stand people who lie right to your face when they know, that you know, that they're lying. I don't get it. Anyway, so, last night I was an angry elf. Nerves such as those usually put me over the edge and force me (yeah, FORCE me- do you REALLY wanna argue with an angry elf?) to binge on all foods that comfort. I did well though, I must tell you, even in the face of the Dark Side which was pulling me toward an Oreo cookie Blizzard. I did not give in to it.

Actually, it was a manic Monday. It was a crazy busy day and it just seems that those are the days that make eating healthy easier because you don't generally have time to stop and ponder all things tasty and chocolate-covered. Except, as a side note, I had the chorus from Manic Monday in my head all day, only I kept singing in my head "Just another Manic Monday...it's not my fun day...I wanna hot fudge sundae...just another Manic Monday"- isn't that hilarious? I didn't really want a hot fudge sundae though because I spent most of the day freezing off my tookus (sp??- please feel free to correct me). But I digress.

I had a Vita Top for breakfast- oh and I have a song in my head about that this morning. All morning I've been altering between "There are worse things I could do..than go with a boy, or 2.." (yeah from Grease- funny!) and "VitaTops, VitaTops, oh Vita VitaTops, Vita Tops , Vita Tops oh Vita Vita Tops, VitaTops, ba-da da da da...". I won't lie- my mind is somewhat verging on the ridiculous today. *stay focused* So, I had this amazing sammie for lunch- it was sliced chicken breast with a sprinkling of fat free shredded cheddar and a smidgen of Sun Dried Tomato Vinaigrette on wheat bread. It was super yummy. And I had some of that NOT-94%-FF popcorn but it hit the spot and was only 3 points.

For dinner we had chicken tacos and I had a handful, OK two, of those semi-sweet chocolate chips. Yummy! See! I did pretty darn good yesterday! AND, drum roll please- tomorrow is WEIGH DAY!!! I'm really looking forward to it! I'll be reporting back here first thing in the morning. Remember, let me know if you're weighing in too and let me know how you did! We're in this together! Happy Tuesday Tidings! (and Eatings!)

Just Another Manic Monday

Well, the weekend went sup-tastic. I am surprised with the amount of time that I spent at home that I was able to avoid mindless snacking. Of course, I actually kept myself quite busy. I reorganized the pantry, cleaned the refrigerator out (during which time I discovered a broccoli salad that I've had in their since the 4th of July- guess I need to clean it out more often- see this is all part of that honesty bit), and I cleaned out the freezer. So pretty now. Well, that took quite a lot of time to do on Saturday. I ate quite healthy all day. I made a very lean pot roast and some broccoli for dinner. Sunday morning I got up and decided I wanted eggs. So I made myself 2 eggs, sunny side up (I'm not sure they were really sunny side up, but isn't that the cutest name??), along with 2 pieces of toast and some milk. And yes, well within a reasonable amount of points for breakfast. For lunch we ate leftover pot roast and since we ate it late we didn't have much of a dinner. I was seriously craving chocolate and the only chocolate in the house was a package of semi-sweet chocolate chips. So I had a small handful of them to satisfy that craving. Semi-sweet chocolate is such a smart weapon to have in the house because it does give me a chocolate fix but the bitterness of it does not leave me wanting more. Then I made some 94% FF popcorn and added a sprinkling of seasoned salt for flavor. I love that popcorn because you can have so much for so little points.

I also, in the spirit of truth, justice, and the healthy way, must confess that I sort of cheated yesterday and weighed myself. I know! It's like the cardinal sin of WW. Well, I don't really know that to be true but I know when I attended meetings you were supposed to wait and weigh at the meetings, so once a week. I've already lost weight, but I'm not gonna say how much at this point because it was cheating. My weigh day is Wednesday and I'll weigh myself in the morning and post it thereafter. If those that are following along plan to weigh then, or any other day for that matter, let me know your weight loss and I'll make Wednesday the Weight Loss Roster day.

Ok, I haven't had coffee yet and I desperately need some but here's to what I hope will continue to be a good week! Luck to all!

Happy Eating!

So, I've made it three whole days!! heh heh Well, yeah, it's not a terribly long time but at least it's 3 days I can say I've done well and be proud of myself. And it was Friday and Fridays are always something to be happy about. Don't get me wrong because I love my job. But having a weekend with the fam is always a nice thought.

So, about a year and a half ago I discovered VitaTops. They're actually muffin tops (no, no, not referring to flab hanging over one's pants). I'm talking about these round, flat discs and they're jam-packed with vitamins, I dunno, maybe some minerals, and loads of flavor. They are only worth 1 WW point!! So right away you think, yeah, must taste like cardboard. Au contraire! They are actually super-yum! They come in loads of varieties, mostly chocolate based. My faves are Triple Chocolate Chunk and Double Chocolate Dream. And they DO taste as good as their names sound. Ok, so, long story short I had one for breakfast and they are actually really filling.

For lunch I came home and my Robb made me a peanut butter sandwich with a surprise pool of jelly smack dab in the middle. I think from now on I'll just make my own sandwiches. When made with wheat bread and a light coating of pb, these sammies aren't bad on the point-o-meter! Plus you get some protein.

Dinner, I splurged since I had plenty of points. I ate some tasty, cheesy pizza. Actually, it's the best pizza of all time if you ask me and you can get it in the freezer section of the grocery store. Yep! That's right! Frozen pizza. Home Run pizza to be exact. Not so easy on the points, but if you have 'em, this pizza is a worthy spend!

So far, not bad. What I love about WW is that you aren't forbidden from eating anything but it'll cost ya! So you start being thrifty with your points. Sure I can eat a piece of cheesecake. It's just that I'll have to live on water and a couple green beans for the rest of the day. So then you start choosing to have a bite of cheesecake rather than the whole piece and you fill up on all of the healthy stuff- and then you wake up one day and realize you're a healthy-eater!!!

So, happy eating this weekend, folks!! But take it easy- weigh day is just around the corner!!

Blechy Blech Blech

So Day 2 is under my belt and I'm still flyin' high! Considering that I had to travel to Timbuktu and back yesterday, I did very well. I had a light Hazelnut Iced Coffee from McD's for breakfast yesterday. Then we had a business lunch meeting at which I talked most of the time (I can hear several of you and your comments- You? Talk the whole time? Never!) and didn't actually eat at lunch. So I scarfed a few bites before we left and while I was not hunger-satisfied I was definitely soul-satisfied that I did not consume all the fried goodies they had to offer.

Dinner threatened to be a bit of a struggle considering my pantry consists mainly of cooking spray, sugar, salt and olive oil and despite the creative chef I may be, there's nothing that can be done with those ingredients. So, we had breakfast for dinner (ain't nuthin' wrong wit dat, yo!). I love having BFD. My Robb really wanted monkey bread and I have this great microwave recipe (no, no- 'tis tasty!) so I started putting together ingredients, desperately hoping to make monkey bread healthy. Is such a daring feat even possible? I say to you, it is! So, you take a can of refrigerator biscuits (which are surprisingly low in points) and cut each doughy disc into quarters. Then you put 2 tablespoons of the lowest fat "butter" possible, about a tablespoon or 2 of water, lots of cinnamon, and 1/3 cup of, wait for it, Splenda Brown Sugar, into a bowl and nuke it for 1 minute. Then add your quartered biscuits, making sure you keep the pieces separated. Toss lightly and nuke that for 2 and 1/2 minutes and voila!- you have monkey bread!

Side Note: So, I'd never used Splenda Brown Sugar which is half splenda, half brown sugar. It was actually tasty and totally fooled my Robb as he didn't notice a diff. Actually, I would say it made the dish richer (mmmm....delish) and it's like half the cals!

With monkey bread, I ate 2 eggs and a few pieces of turkey bacon (which I have amazingly discovered I like far more than real bacon- no lie!) It was a great day for my "un-diet". =) hehe

Day One is Done

So ends my first day on this path to a healthier weight. I can honestly say that I've stayed within my daily points with just enough points to savor a Mountain Dew before I head to bed. I know, I know. Doesn't seem like the best of ideas to drink a caffeine-packed sugary beverage just before hitting the hay. But, to my knowledge, Mountain Dew never hurt any hay. Right? Lame. I know. It's also probably not a wise move considering that I have to get up at the butt-crack of dawn to drive all the way to Elgin, IL (North of Chicago) for a meeting at 11am. Blech!

Anyhoo, I started the day with a bowl of Kashi Go Lean cereal and boy, they're not kidding about making healthy food taste good. So yummy in my tummy. I think I started the day just right. A pudding snack and Healthy Choice meal for lunch and I was good to go for the rest of my afternoon. It's always nice when you actually choose the right foods that fill you up during the day. I know this will not always happen, but it's a good thing it did on Day One.

I made a chicken breast and turkey bacon sandwich for dinner and my Robb was even jealous of my tasty meal. Mmm...hmmm...that's right. I also stole a few of Lainie's puffs snacks but considering you can eat like 70 pieces for 25 calories, I wasn't really worried.

All in all it was a good start. So? How about the rest of you?

In the Beginning....God Created Food

Good morning to all! I am so excited that so many people have responded and some are even choosing to join in on the action! Remember, if you want to share your experiences you can post them in the comments or email me ahead of time and I'll include your stuff in my post!

So, this is Day One. Because I know that there are those that have decided they need accountability too, I don't have any choice. There will be no backing down, no bowing out. I simply must finish what I've started. I have decided that the only way for this to work (at least for myself) is to be brutally honest about everything with one major exception- you know, women don't reveal their weight. That's the only thing I won't be revealing (duh!), but everything else is fair game!

How honest, you might be wondering? Honest enough that if I gain 12 pounds in one week because I suddenly decide that chocolate really is essential to every meal, I'll tell you. If I wasn't able to resist the Ravioli di Portabello at Olive Garden and I ate myself stupid, yeah, I'll tell you that too. I'll even admit it when I come to work in maternity pants because they are more comfortable than the rest of the pants in my closet that I can still wear but are snug enough to be uncomfortably so- I won't try to pretend like everything else in my wardrobe was dirty and much to my chagrin I was "forced" to wear said maternity pants.

That said, yeah. *heh heh* I'm wearing maternity pants today. Oh, for those women out there that have finally given in to the scary, belly-stretched pants during pregnancy and came to realize and appreciate just how wonderful they can be, you may do well to understand that they remain comfortable for those of us overweight folk even after pregnancy. I'm not condoning this ridiculous behavior so much as desperately trying to justify it! ~tee hee~ As I sit here and realize exactly what I'm about to admit to and put out there for the world to read, I feel that I should be more embarrassed than I am. I am, slightly so. But to my everlasting shame, I'm still in love with them. At least for now. I still wear those snug pants too, so have no fear- my entire wardrobe does not consist solely of maternity clothes. =) And just as soon as I drop about 15 pounds I think those pants will no longer be snug at all!

So, tonight I will blog about how Day One turned out. Any words you want to share, please do so. We're in this together, people!

And........WE'RE OFF!

Desperately Seeking Accountability

I've decided that I really want to lose weight. But darn it, if it's not nearly impossible to stay motivated. I mean, seriously, it's one thing right after another. Just when I get settled into a resolute peace, BAM!, something new goes awry and I'm back yearning for chocolate to soothe the soul or deep-fried mozz sticks to comfort me. Side note: the truth is, those chocolate goodies and fried delights do, if momentarily, bring a great calm for me in the middle of a nervous breakdown, er, I mean storm. However, when the scales serve the evidence to me the next morning of just exactly what those treats brought to the table, I sink into depression, yet again. And then, chocolate? Is that you? Oooooh! And you brought caramel with you? Mmm hmmm....it's a vicious cycle of good-for-nothings.

Once upon a time, in a galaxy (read: life) far, far away....I used to do Weight Watchers. I used to attend meetings and follow the plan faithfully and I lost a good deal of weight. Knowing that I can be successful on WW I really, really want to follow it again. Here's the prob (because, after all, there has to be a prob to begin with)- I just can't justify (yes, I mean afford) to attend meetings right now. Seeing as I still have my materials and notes from my earlier endeavors, I thought I might, perchance, do it on my own. Yeah, but that presents another issue: I NEED ACCOUNTABILITY. I don't know if it was the applause roaring for pounds lost, ringing the bell for each 5 pound accomplishment, the stickers for minor steps taken in the right direction, or the rewards for major milestones (I once got the coolest key chain for losing 10% of my starting weight, and a refrigerator magnet for losing 25 pounds), but attending meetings seemed to be key for me. So, if I cannot attend then I must find a new avenue of praise and reward to satiate my inner child for giving up a life of comfort-eating.

So, as I've been trying to figure out what I should blog about, it occurred to me that this blog would be the perfect opportunity and outlet for accountability and maybe even a cyber-high five here, and a virtual pat on the back there. I also had this inkling that maybe, just maybe, others might want to join in on the action via comments of their own undertakings to shed some flab. I invite anyone who wants to participate by commenting with your own stories, encouraging those who are desperately trying to stick with it, or just to laugh with us when we cite midnight awakenings to the cries of a donut begging to be consumed. Here's to ya- may the most devoted lose!

What God's Love Looks Like

Sometimes you have to get sucker punched right in the gut to get it. I mean, sometimes you just have to be within inches of sanity to realize what it is. Sometimes you have to come directly to the edge of the cliff and look over expecting that any second a mighty gust of wind is going to sweep over you and you'll fall head first over the cliff to know what it means. "It" is the love that God has for those He created.

I would probably, normally have compared His love to a Mother's love. Sure, it's that. The love you feel for your child is a different love than any other love you have for those in your life. It's a fiercely protective love. It is self sacrificing. It exists from the beginning. His love is even more than that.

Some would compare His love to that of a husband and wife. The tender, companionship type of love that chooses you above all else in this world. The love of a person who knows the real you- the horrid, hateful you, the kind, gentle you, the funny you, the crazy you, the wretched you, the near-perfect you- and loves you no matter what. Chooses you even still.

God's love is both. God's love is everything love is supposed to be. Everything love can be. God's love exists no matter what your heart's current attachment may be. His love is for you always.

The most profound characteristic of His love is how quickly it heals. Not how quickly it heals you, but how quickly it heals itself. Day after day we stomp on God's heart. We make lofty promises in prayer and then walk away, as if God is left in our bedroom not to witness our day, and we go out and do the opposite of what we promised. God wasn't left in our bedroom where we left our prayerful promises. He sees every move we make. Every sin we commit. We claim our love for Him as eagerly as teenagers who have discovered their first infatuation. We repeat what we've heard our Pastors and family and friends say in their prayers as if just a repetition of "the right words" even matters to God. We are deceitfully fulfilled by our chatter as if we have accomplished a task on our daily "to-do" list. Then we go out and we commit our affairs. We chase our lusts and desires. We go after the things we idolize. We seek that which makes us feel good. We work on bolstering our self-esteem, making more money to buy more stuff, shopping to soothe our souls, we complain about our jobs demanding too much, we gossip about people to make ourselves feel better, and at the end of the day we return home. We watch tv, eat dinner (sometimes throwing up a quick prayer to God that might be the equivalent of a "high five", thanks for the meal), and then we go to bed.

There we find God where we left Him, forgetting that He accompanied us through our entire day. We offer our thanks for the day, toss in a few "please be with"s for those in our lives that are suffering, and ask that God help us through tomorrow. Then God cries. He is the scorned lover that wasn't waiting at home oblivious to our wayward heart. He is the only eyewitness account of our entire day's endeavors. He is crushed over and over again. But, with His new mercy each morning, He continues to love us. He continues to forgive us. He knows exactly what we have our hearts set to do even before we know and He still chooses love.

It isn't until we experience the kind of kick-in-the-gut situation that we get it. I have been faced with such a situation. I have gone through such a situation recently, in fact. You love someone so much and for some reason they don't get it. They can't understand your love for them. Suddenly, you're rocked, riddled by pain that you just can't understand. You struggle between the world's point of view and God's. You stop and think about the fact that He has given everything and anything just to be with you and how could you offer less to those you love. You experience rejection like you've never known and you remember those mindless prayers you offered up and the God of all love that still took you back every night. You are torn between pain and the punishment you want to inflict and the love you have and the knowledge of all that God has done for you. You either make the sacrifice and choose to continue to love or you turn and walk away to "save" your heart. I sacrificed.

The most unexpected return in all of this is to find out that the sacrifice proved to be the blessing. And you can only know that because you chose it. You can see how it would have turned out if you had taken any other path only because you didn't. Putting aside the anger, the hurt, the claims you have with which you could charge someone. You find that it was better. In the moment before your decision is made you just think that walking away from that person will make all of the pain and hurt go away. But when you don't walk away, you realize that walking away would have produced a new world of pain. It's so mind-boggling to find that choosing forgiveness actually healed the pain. How can it be so?

I have learned to listen for God's will. Actually, I had already learned to really listen before this situation and if not for such learning I would never have made the right decision. I don't mean to talk in twists and turns but I will explain.

About a year ago I was, let's say, tipped off that I'd be out of a job come January. I was quite preggers, as you may or may not recall, and it was quite scary to think of not having a job right around the time I expected to return to work. Knowing this, I started looking for a new job that I could start after maternity leave. I knew of another employer and I attempted to contact this employer's president. I did a few times to no avail. I turned to God and said, "Lord, I know Your will is best for my life. How could I not want what's best? You can see things that I can't and you know why something it not best that may look good to me now. So, if you want me to have this job, then let the employer's president respond. If she does not, then I know it isn't what you have for me." Before you go all, "look at her being so faithful to God", there was an even bigger lesson to be learned here. See, she did call me back. She told me that I was seriously underpaid and I deserved so much more. She wanted me to take whatever time I needed for my leave and start whenever I was ready. She also wanted to take with me one of my co-workers as we'd make the perfect team. After I hung up, I called my co-worker to tell her the good news. Not long after that conversation, my co-worker told me that she would be starting with them shortly, and she did. What I didn't tell anyone was that I didn't feel comfortable about going to work for them. From the second I hung up the phone with the employer's president, I was on a mission to convince myself it was right. After all, I specifically told God not to have her call me unless it was His will, right? Not exactly.

The unsettled feeling gnawed at me constantly. Each time it did I would talk to a friend or a family member reciting all of the promises the employer's president made to me. Of course, that person would tell me I was so lucky to have such a great opportunity. And each time, that gnawing feeling would all but subside. But it wasn't long and it was back. And each time it came back it brought friends.

So what did this mean? This was supposed to be a gift from God, right? Why was I so uneasy about it? Well, I didn't ask God not to let her call if it wasn't His will. I just asked that she call if it was His will. Her interest in me and my co-worker turned out to be His will after all, but it was only part of it. See, what God really had planned for me was to take my co-worker's position she was leaving behind, something that had never crossed my mind. Until the day it was offered to me, the day my co-worker announced she was leaving. The moment it was offered to me I accepted and that unsettled feeling was gone. However, the offer from the other employer was still very much on the table. In fact, they were expecting me to work for them. I still had to tell them "no", and in telling them "no" I would have to tell those that I had worked so hard to convince (while trying to convince myself), that it wasn't the right place for me. I know I followed God's will.

So when this more current situation arose, I already knew how to listen for God's will. Let me tell you, sometimes, you have to listen very, very carefully. The world is a very loud place and those in it have very loud voices. God's voice is very small, very quiet. I think it's because He wants us to want to hear His voice and in order to do so, you have to shut all other noise out. He wants our undivided attention. I wouldn't have known how to put my hurt aside to continue with love if God hadn't already taught me how to listen to His voice when all other voices threaten to drown Him out. He was clear. He is message is always love. But love isn't always easy and that's when His strength and His example are what carries us through to the other side.

Lessons learned: Love isn't easy but it's still the blessing and it's worth it. God's lessons are hard and sometimes painful, but they are always most rewarding when we listen for Him.